Wednesday, 16 January 2008

Health and Safety advice

... courtesy of this fab card:

Please take heed!

Also, while I'm here, there is one other matter I need to touch on: does anyone else have Nellie the Elephant firmly lodged in their head now?? If so, you have my abject apologies. And if it's any consolation, I can reassure you that you're not alone, because SHE'S BEEN DRIVING ME TO DISTRACTION!! Grr.

Anyway, please don't let good old Nellie (or anything else) distract you from the important shoplifting info: do please remember the advice, and stay safe out there. (Especially you, lauren - I know you have trouble with your back at the best of times, and I wouldn't want you to go aggravating anything.)



Lesley said...

When asked if she needed any help in Harvey Nicholls in Birmingham by a very posh member of staff my lovely befuddled Mum said 'No thank you. We're just shoplifting' - bless:)

Lesley x
.....and of she went with a trumpety trump.........

Lucy Locket-Pocket said...

Great picture! Anyway, what's wrong with Nelly? Have you started dreaming about her too? Just think, you could be knitting elephants instead of monkeys soon! Lucy x

Kitty said...

Teehee - I love the shoplifting card. That's going to save a LOT of back strain.

Thanks to for the linky to Lauren's blog -I've just had a lovely time ambling through her bits and pieces.

Take care. x

PS Yaikayu is my work verification - is that a plant???

lauren said...

HA!!! when i saw the card (which IS hilarious, btw) i thought, "well sure, NOW she tells me!!!" ...and then i saw my name...! but seriously...that would've been SOOOOOO helpful in *NOVEMBER*, VC!!! (sheesh!) :)

(ps: i can't decide now whether i should go and listen to the nelly song or not...on the one hand, i'm dying of curiosity...on the other hand, in addition to back-strain, i'm HIGHLY susceptible to songs that get stuck in your head...i don't THINK the two things are connected, but ya never know...)


lauren said...

ok, YOU KNEW i would succumb and go listen, right??! :) a couple of questions:

1. why is nellie *TOPLESS*??! (it wouldn't be weird...seeing as how she's an ELEPHANT...except she's also wearing a very short and flouncy's oddly disturbing...)

2. were nellie and the head of the herd having "a thing"??! (silvery light...road to's all sounding kinda "booty call" to me; lookout, nellie!)

3. is that *BALDRIC* as the firechief??

4. have you seen THIS version??! (well, i mean, as long as the song is ALREADY stuck in your might as well have a rockin' beat!)

5. can somebody PLEASE hum something else??! seriously! "mambo #5"?! "the name game"??! ANYTHING! pleeeeeeeease!! (quickly!!!)


Monkee Maker said...

Ha ha, a brilliant card .... how do you come up with this stuff?

And, unlike Lauren, I shall NOT be listening to any Nellie tunes, thank you very much. And if you start to put links to these pesky tunes (ala Lesley) then I shall seriously have to consider my membership to this blog.

Damn and blast it! How did that happen? Just typing about Nellie was enough to get that ***** tune firmly lodged up there. Cheers VC!


Anonymous said...

y father (84 and a bit lala) says the only way to get rid of a tune that's stuck in your head spend some time in a darkened room with your fingers in your ears singing 'Horsey Horsey' (horsey horsey, don't you stop, just let your feet go clippety clop, tail goes swish as the wheels go round, giddy-up we're homeward bound-for those of you NOT as old or well versed in silly songs!) However, after having tried it to rid my head of the neighbours theme tune....I was very quickly singing horsey horsey INSTEAD!!! But he swears it works for him, and it just MIGHT for you too!!! Fran

tintocktap said...

Reminds me of all those vans you see for shopfitters - somehow I always read them as shoplifters!

And, of course, every time you mention Nellie, I start singing.

Michaela said...

I just did a first aid course and there is now a new stance on artificial respiration. Believe it or not - and I swear this is true - you now have to give 2 puffs of air to every 30 pumps of the heart. The pumps should be done fairly quickly, and I quote 'sing Nellie The Elephant up to the trump, trump, trump part and that is the correct length of time to get your 30 pumps in'. I kid you not.