Monday, 1 October 2007

All day it has rained

STOP!! Before you click away from this post in disgust, let me just say that this isn't going to be a whinging-about-the-weather post (I'm saving that one for when I run out of ideas - or for a rainy day, if you will. Har har.)

Admittedly, it is going to be weather-related. Sort-of kind-of. But you'll like it, honest. It's worth sticking around for, anyway.

Today, it has been raining non-stop in Bristol. Now, rain is ok; it's not as fun as sunshine, but I can cope with it. However, if rain starts to show any signs of gearing up to a storm (or if there are no signs, but my overactive imagination runs away with me), I start to get a little antsy. I wouldn't go as far as to say I'm a gibbering wreck, but I'm certainly not at ease.

Now, before you go calling me all shades of yellow-bellied wuss, I would like to point out that I was not always this way. Once upon a time, I was quite fond of a good storm. Right up until three months ago, when the roof of our flat was struck by lightning.

Exhibit A

Since then, the threat of a storm (either real or imagined) makes me nervous. Not that it wasn't a whole heap of fun at the time, of course. I shall re-enact for you, in seven easy steps:

1) The sky turns purple.

2) A downpour of Biblical proportions comes on very suddenly, accompanied by thunder and lightning.

3) We count the seconds between the flashes and the crashes to try and work out how far away the storm is.

4) I say, "that sounds quite close now - I hope we don't get hit".

5) T'Other Half says, "don't be silly, of course we won't get hit".

6) There's an almighty BANG as we get hit.

7) I cry like a big girl.

In all seriousness, it wasn't really that bad, as nobody got hurt. However, the power surge did wipe out a heck of a lot of electrical equipment, including the computer, the TV, and - worst of all - the kettle. (Bear in mind, here, that my natural response to any crisis is to attempt to solve it with tea. Take away my ability to brew up and I am completely lost.) It was only last week that we got round to replacing the last broken thing (computer speakers). T'Other Half got quite emotional about being fully computerised again - very fond of technology, that one - and has taken to referring to the new computer as "Phoenix".

As I type this, I think the rain is easing off a bit, but I'm not willing to take any chances. So if you'll excuse me, I must go now - I need to busy myself with straining to hear the sound of any distant thunder.

T'Other Half has just told me in no uncertain terms that I can't blog about our lightning incident without mentioning this: after our old computer got fried, she built the new one herself from lots of fiddly little electrical components. (So if there are ever any spelling errors in my blog posts, or if it appears that I am just speaking nonsense, then she's probably to blame for putting one of the screws back in wrong. That's how it works - honest.) So, well done T'Other Half - you're very clever. Now please may I go and have my tea?


Monkee Maker said...

Ooh-err missus, that sounds highly alarming!

But hark .... what's that rumbling I hear in the distance??

Quick!! Do what RGH's Dad used to do - turn all the mirrors to the wall and cover all crockery! (well, you can never be too sure)

And fair play to NBM for building you a bionic new computer.

Oh phew! Just realised ..... that loud rumbling? My stomach. Need chox.

Northern Baking Monkey said...

Thank you monkee maker, at least *some* people appreciate my technical prowess enabling dialogue about monkees in the blogosphere ;) If it wasn't for me VC would not be able blog about monkehs and such!

Love you really VC,

NBM xxx

PS she says she would find a way... I believe the power of the monkehs very strong within her... *eek!*

Jane said...

I'm in awe about the building of the computer.
Ours got fried last year - along with most other electric things now we have a plug surge thingy and I manically run about pulling plugs when I hear thunder.
I love thunder storms but I also loved my old computer.

Melissa said...

Okay, that was impressive (both the strike and the re-building of the computer). MM, was that actually a "Six Million Dollar Man" ("We can re-build him - we have the technology") reference? I think one of the US networks just launched an updated version of "The Bionic Woman" over here this fall. Just goes to show that there's nothing new on tv.

I love electric kettles. You could hardly find them in the US in the 90s, but they're gaining in popularity nowadays. The two comforts of civilization (or even civilisation) that I adopted upon returning stateside were the electric kettle and the 13tog duvet. Mmm.

Katy said...

My best friend's mum used to run around the house like a lunatic unplugging everything, including the phone - because the lightning apparently comes down the phone line and zaps you in the ear, and then you are dead. So you are right to be VERY afraid!

Super clever computer building t'other half tho - round of applause and BIG pats on back there!!!! (I am swooning at your hero-like computer saving/rebuilding abilities - swoon, swoon!!)

Viv said...

I can *so* relate to that. I#m not actually *afraid* of thunderstorms anymore. I was when I was little, but nowadays I'm still uneasy when I hear distant thunder. It was particularly frightening during a stay by the North sea. Our house there is on a man-made hill thing (all houses in that area are, as the area is prone to be flooded - the sea, ya know - and so the houses are kinda "elevated"), right in the middle of a flat, pancake-ish island. One night I woke up, thinking "My husband's gone mad, fiddling with the light switch at 3 am" until I was wide awake, only to realize that izt was by no means my husband but an enormous storm front approaching. Luckily, it either passed by or changed direction at some point..I daren't imagine what could have happened otherwise...

lauren said...

monkee maker: surely RGH's dad's preparations are better suited to VAMPIRE ATTACKS than storms? (but good advice, nonetheless!)

btw, there IS a new version of "bionic woman" on american tv starring--wait for it--michelle ryan from eastenders! ( finding out kat was her mum wasn't traumatic enough...?!)

NBM is clearly an unbelievably well-rounded woman! baking AND computers?! oof--bites and BYTES-hahahaha! (sorry. i'll get my coat.)